The midwife and I got a run in today. Nothing fancy, just 30 minutes out and about (me with the stroller that pulls so hard to the left I'm beginning to not enjoy running with it). She stayed for tea after, and we got chatting, as we're apt to do. I'm struggling with heading back to work post-baby - and not so much because of leaving the Chou, because, frankly she's so bored of me. So, so, so bored and half a day playing with her peers is going to be so good for her, and me, probably, once I get over my separation anxiety.
What I'm struggling with is this: I think I'm totally sick of my job. Sort of. See how convincing I am? (oh, and Dave B - let's keep this between you and me, OK?)
My problem is several layers deep. I'd rather not be desk-bound for my job, or at least not all of my day. In fact, I promised myself that my LAST job was my last 100% desk job. Then there's the monotony of what it is I'm doing; I'm going on six (seven?) years of essentially doing the same thing over and over. And I'm working from home, which is lovely in so many ways, but some days I crave the everyday interaction that is the office. And, quite frankly, there are so many things I'm interested in and want to do that I start looking at the calendar thinking - there's so much more I could be doing.
And then the midwife steps in and offers up a very real and much needed reality check. My job is pretty sweet for a new mum. I've been able to freelance and make some extra cash while on mat leave and that's not possible for most career types. I can work from home, adding a level of flexibility in my schedule. My job is mobile; something that means the world right now to Mr. Wumpus's job. And while I may be desk-bound, my job is intellectually stimulating, interesting and sometimes even fun. I've met some magnificent people and feel honored to have told their stories. I've traveled with this job, and it's provided opportunities to experience places and conferences that would have been out of reach if I were only freelancing.
In short, my job is a really good fit for us right now. Maybe that will change in 6 months or a year or never, but right now, it's pretty sweet.
The midwife added that we're a rather blessed generation, too. And she's right. Our grandparents, heck, our parents had one job and stuck it out, whether they really enjoyed it or not. Our generation's mentality is so different - we feel we should be happy in our work (and I think we should) and that we should find that balance between life and work. I'm blessed because a) I have a job and b) I feel like I could change careers, experience something new or do anything I really wanted to do. Not everyone has that luxury.
I'm content for now, and even looking forward to work in some ways. The office here is a little quiet, but the coffee is good and the dress code is very, very informal. Instead of focusing on what I'd change, I'm going to dive head first into what I have in front of me to do and give it a good go.
I could love writing people's stories again. I think.