I start my first day back at work in three minutes. Just enough time to emo-barf all over my blog.
Chou is off to her first day of daycare. Yesterday was integration day, today she's on her own. Did I mention yesterday went fantastic? I stayed with her for the first while, then left to run some errands and when I returned she hardly noticed my arrival and hadn't noticed my departure.
Today will be a bit different. She was a bit clingy when I dropped her off, but didn't cry (that I know of). She's also been up since 6, so is likely tired and I wonder how she'll nap in a new place with a virtual stranger tucking her in. At least she's got new toys and two lovely boys to try and kiss.
But for me, I came home to an empty house, an empty high chair and empty crib. I still have my ear trained for her little noises as if she's simply napping in the next room. My chest is a little heavy with the worry that she needs me and I'm not there. I miss her already and it's been exactly 34 minutes since I saw her last.
Tell me this gets easier.
2 comments:
It does. Sort of.
But she's smart and tough and she'll be fine. Mamas on the other hard are a little more squishy and not as resilient. At least that's me.
Wait, I was supposed to make you feel better. I'm a bad friend.
Yes, it does, but with each one, you want to make time stand still. Because you know that this won't come around again in this way...it'll be different with the next, and when its the last, you want to savour every moment because you know that it won't be again. Anyway, this is making me lonely, because now I feel guilty for just wanting them to move out of the house already!
luv, J9
ps if its any consolation, when I got to play with chou chou, it brought all the warm moments back...
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